Oktoberfest
If you curious about how to thrive in Oktoberfest, please read this blog. If you are curious about how to get beaten up at Oktoberfest, please, also read this blog.
Here's the deal, in a beautifully short and simple post.
Get the whole outfit thing, otherwise you will look out of place. Don't pay more than $100 for it.
You can only be in the tents if you are buying beer or food.
You can't take your time drinking/eating. They want you spending as much money as fast as possible.
The roller coasters are expensive as shit, but definitely fun.
The food is fantastic, no matter what you get (duck and half chicken are the best).
Avoid weekends, it is far too crowded. We went on a Monday after seeing the grounds on a Saturday, and it was perfectly populated.
Get there at 12 if you go on a Monday. We went at 10 and it was awkwardly empty and made us drink too much too soon.
Hofbrau Tent is the most young, fun and lively, also the largest.
Hacker Pschorr tent is the most aesthetically pleasing tent, and we liked the beer there a lot.
Last but not least, if someone at your table makes a mess, they dump beer to clean it up. Don't get mad at them for doing so-you may end up pinned to the ground.